Today Might Just Be the Day...

What happens in the daily life of the family.. the drama of foster care, the adventures of parenting, & pictures to share with everyone!

How much excitement can you take?

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What a weekend! Can I go back to work? Ha! Like I have a job.

The zoo in a nice calm rain is great. The animals all come out to enjoy the rain. It’s not unbearably hot. There aren’t many crowds.

The zoo in a downpour is not so fun.

The boys still loved playing in the water, but Bethany & I were not as pleased.

Movies are fun no matter what the weather. But I have to say that they’re more fun if you have one adult to every couple of kids, rather that one adult and four kids.

Urgent Care is never a good thing. They were very nice. And they have a couple new perks–they brought out a cart of a couple snacks. They now have personal t.v.’s in the exam rooms. I wish I didn’t know that these were new things.

Bean’s sores in her mouth came back for the first time in over a year. So, at least they’re fewer and far between. Hopefully she’ll sleep through the night. We both could use the rest.

We did get to take advantage of some cool technology. I know we’re a bit behind, but Nana & Papa chatted with the children over the Internet tonight.

Laundry, and paperwork, and more paperwork, and more laundry, with a few dishes thrown in all await me tonight…

Are you sure I can’t go back to work tomorrow?

He’s getting a tattoo, yeah, he’s getting ink done. He asked for a 13, but he got a 31…

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TattooAs most of my friends know, I have a tattoo on my lower back. I got it when I was 20, before the term “tramp stamp” was coined. It’s a Woodland Violet. I picked it for a few reasons. One, it stands for my sorority. Secondly, it reminds me of my mom–she always had African Violets. And it’s pretty and girly and I just liked it.
They say that tattoos are addictive and once you get one, you’ll get more. Well, I have no clue if that’s true or not, but I’ve always wanted a second. I wanted a lion for the longest time. However, I could never find the right one. They always looked angry or mean or cartoonish (is that even a word). I couldn’t find one that looked like it was simply strong.
Then, as we started adding our children, I wanted a tattoo that would represent them.
We have had two foster children who have come and gone from our home. And both of them have had a huge impact on me. And, I think, we have had a similar impact on them. One little guy came to us not speaking at all. He had food issues and behavioral issues. Each day that he was here was a struggle for us. When he left, however, he was speaking in 3-4 word phrases. He wasn’t eating out of the trash anymore. He had come a long way. And I was his mom for the short time that he was here.
Our last foster kiddo was much the same. While there weren’t the huge issues at the surface, there were trust issues right below the surface. There was a sadness that was there in the beginning that had all but vanished at the end.
How could I think of my children without counting those two in the flock?
Anyhow, as I contemplated, someone suggested birds to represent my children. And I thought it so appropriate. All of my kids are only here in the nest for a time. We are growing them all to be able to leave as adults. And they will all take a part of my heart with them–just as our other kids already have.
So, each of these birds is for one of my children.

I’ve got friends in low places…

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Thankfully, my friends don’t mind the company when I join them.

I just was looking at the weather here for the next few days. We’re going to dip under 100 for a couple days, but then it goes back up to 104 by next weekend. I am thinking, however, that under 100 might mean that tomorrow is a day for the zoo.

After the depressing news about how “cold” our September is shaping up to be, I got to see the good news. It will be 10 degrees cooler in Sacramento next week! I am very excited. I get to go see three good friends, snuggle a newborn, and just enjoy a little kid free time.

I got a bit of that in this week here as well.

Brian came home early on Tuesday (thanks, Baby) so that I could go out with the girls. I am so lucky to have not only an amazing husband and great kids, but also wonderful friends! Renee and Jessica and I went out for sushi “in the Ra” and then to a girl’s night out night at Beauty Brands. It was fun. Plain and simple. We ate amazing food. We toasted to the good and the bad and someone that Jess has never even met. We (Jess) did Renee’s makeup (I helped by handing her random stuff). We all got our hands dipped in hot wax and cute little flowers painted on our nails. And we did a bit of shopping. Like I said, it was fun.

When I was in college, I had to write a life statement for a leadership class. And I picked a Jimmy Buffett quote for the top of my statement;

Some people never find it,
Some only pretend. But me,
I just want to live happily ever after
Every now and then.

Sometimes it gets hard to lose focus on the small things. That was a very fun night. It was a happily ever after night.

Then, because I’m spoiled, I got to have another one of those nights on Wednesday with the man of my dreams.

I guess I’m not spoiled. It seems I just might be a princess. I must be at the end of the movie or the end of the story, I think I’ve found my happily ever after–at least on occasion 🙂

School starts and more

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Where to start… so many things are on my mind right now.

Family goes first. Bean is now sleeping in her big girl bed! She’s moved to the toddler bed that our last foster daughter used. I think she really likes being able to get up on her own in the morning. And we’ve only had to put her back to bed a few times.

The little guy is having more good days than bad as far as going to school. When I left him this morning he was bawling and had to be held so he wouldn’t run for the door. But, he’s made a new friend and is buddies with one of the teachers now. In a couple weeks, I don’t think we’ll have any issues getting him to go to school.

The big boys are starting to struggle with homework. But, that’s pretty normal. It’s not that the work is too hard. It’s more that the days are long.

I had a wonderful night out with my girlfriends last night and Brian watched a documentary that he enjoyed.

I want to vent and rant, but the washer just stopped its cycle so that will have to wait.

Spending

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Fail.

Sigh.

I spent money yesterday.

But, I didn’t spend much. And it was a “need” not a want. I cleaned my floors yesterday and needed solution for my floormate.

One of the struggles that I have is forgiveness. No, I don’t have a problem forgiving others. I have a problem forgiving myself. Or, rather, allowing myself to fail without deeming myself a failure. Does that make any sense?

Anyhow, I’m not going to beat myself up. I’m going to get back on the horse and try again next week.

The remarkable thing about not spending is that it really opens my eyes to how many times I want to spend and what a habit spending is and has become for me.

When I posed the question about spending to a group of moms, many were surprised that this would be a challenge for me. So, it got me thinking. Even as I sit here right now there are things that are calling me to spend. I have a package that needs to be shipped. I have coupons sitting next to me. There’s a new message from Southwest Air with discount air fares. At the top of my browser, there are links to all sorts of wonderful sites with untold treasures. I have been very lucky. There has never been a point in my life where I worried about my next meal. There’s never been a time that I have had to do without the basics. For the most part, I’ve actually been pretty darn spoiled. And I don’t know if that’s a good thing. It makes it so easy to take things for granted.

I see it in my children now.

When I tell them that I don’t have any money for the toys in the machines, they tell me to get out a credit card or to go to the bank.

When they don’t get what they want when they want it, the result is disappointment or, sometimes, a tantrum.

They are spoiled.

But, now I have to play devil’s advocate. When our older boys came to us, they didn’t have this mentality. They didn’t have a sense of entitlement. They didn’t demand anything. They didn’t ask for anything. And it was sad. They’d never been given things. They’d never had options.

So, I, again, I will forgive myself. I can indulge them. I can give them things. I can spoil them. Just not on Mondays.

65% off!

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So, I blame my mom for this one. And I don’t think she’ll be surprised by that. I love “saving” money. Brian and my dad both agree that it’s kind of a backwards concept. But, I think that the guys also agree that it’s nice knowing that their women keep the family fed and looking nice without going too far overboard.

For the past couple months I have been using a site http://www.thegrocerygame.com/ to create my shopping lists. Basically, this site shows me what items to buy, where to find the coupons, and the deal that I’ll get in the end. It does cost a few dollars a week, but I more than make up for it most weeks.

There’s another blog that I read that the woman sets up her purchases each trip and shows how much she saved and what she got for the $$. Well, I was thinking that I’d do the same. Then I went to the store.

And I can’t imagine taking an extra step and displaying what I bought. So, here are my non-displayed purchases… Basically I bought enough that it covered our table. And my savings were $171.88! I ended up spending $113. I think that around $40 in savings were from coupon.

We’ll see how far the food goes though. I guess that’s always the issue. I went to the store on Tuesday to do this big trip and the little guy and I went back yesterday already. I just can’t fit enough milk in our fridge for a whole week. And we fly through fruit like no body’s business.

One of the biggest struggles for me going from a very independent woman who contributed to our family incomes, to the stay at home parent, has been finding satisfaction. Being a mom is a never ending project. There’s rarely a point that my house is totally clean (rare as in, hasn’t happened to me yet), and if the laundry is done it only is done for a matter of hours, until the next change happens. When one child is having huge successes, another will be struggling. And once one task is learned, another is there waiting to be taught.

I think that’s why I enjoy this “game”. I get to feel like I got something accomplished. And I feel like I’m using our resources well. It’s hard not contributing to our bottom line financially. So, I’m going to count this weeks savings as my part!

Where does the time go?

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I guess it goes to taking our kids out. On Monday night we had the amazing opportunity to tell over 200 people just a little bit about our foster kids. Through this event 181 foster children will get to go to basketball camp for free! We got to see our favorite Globe Trotter, Buckets, in person. We also got to meet several local politicians–and we need as many of them on our side as possible these days!

It also went by pretty quickly this weekend! There was a new event in Scottsdale called, “Fostering Fun”. We found a broken bat while we were touring the stadium that the Giants call home during Spring training.

Just as we were about to leave, a firetruck pulled up and all of the kids got some one on one time with the fire fighters. They all loved getting in the truck. Vinny got to try on the Captain’s helmet. And the older boys are getting to an age that they can understand all of the equipment that is stored on the truck.

Again, as I post these pictures, I’m a little sad. I so wish I could plaster my little boy all over the place. His blue eyes are worth sharing! We spoke with his caseworker this week. And I am trying to relax in the fact that, “no new is good news”. Our next court date is in November. At that point, hopefully we’ll be able to move to the adoption side.

Homework started for our older boys this week. We are working on getting a system down that will keep all of us happy and get all of the work done to the best of their abilities. I swear, school was much easier when we were younger. Maybe my parents would disagree?

The Bean is awake.. I am being paged 🙂

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So much to share, no time to share it!

Just wanted to let you know that No Money Monday #2 happened. Although, I did fish out some change for a parking meter last night. I didn’t plan on it and didn’t have any choice, so I let myself slide on that one.

We’ve had lots of events here lately. Saturday was a foster care event, last night was a fund raiser for foster children…

Hopefully I’ll post during afternoon naps!

https://www.momtomany.net/60/

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So, Monday was a piece of cake.

It has made me think about why I’m out and about spending so often, though. And I’ve realized that a lot of the time it’s in the name of saving. I do CVS and the grocery store once a week with my coupons. Then I do the bread store every other week or so–it saves me about $20 a month to go to the bread outlet. And then there’s Costco… we do Costco once a month or so. Again, all in the name of savings.

Enough of money chat, though!

I wanted to invite any locals to an event on Monday. Brian and I have been asked to speak at a mock-tail party. It’s a fund raiser for foster children. They are raising money for scholarships to a basketball camp. There will be all sorts of local politicians (don’t hold it against the event, please), a few WNBA players and coaches, and us 🙂 The basketball camp will be in the middle of September. Daniel and David attended one earlier this summer and loved it. This time, they will get a pair of Nikes!

Anyhow, the event costs $25 a person and is nearly sold out, so if you’re interested, let me know quickly!

One more note–Happy Birthday, Mom! Janice had a big birthday yesterday and I hope it was wonderful.

https://www.momtomany.net/59/